When You Feel Like Giving Up…

by | Mar 6, 2024 | Podcast

I think we can all agree that building a business is a rollercoaster ride of emotions. And sometimes, that rollercoaster ride can make it seem like the idea of giving up on your business dreams is the easiest and best option for you. And, guess what, sometimes it IS the right thing to do. So, how do you know when you should give up on your business dreams and when you should keep moving forward? I’ll give you the key signs to look for in this episode.

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FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPT BELOW:

I think we can all agree that building a business is a roller coaster ride of emotions, and sometimes that roller coaster ride can make it feel like giving up on your dream. Business is the easiest and best option. And guess what? Sometimes it is. Sometimes that is the right thing to do. So how do you know when you should give up on your business dreams and when you should keep pushing forward? I’ll give you the key signs to look for in this episode, so stay tuned. Hey, hey there, friends, welcome back to the Flow Business Podcast. I’m Shawn, your host, and this is your place to build a business that complements your life, not complicates it, and that goes along really well with what we’re going to talk about today, which is the very honest, very real question of should I ever give up on my business, on this whole dream and plan and goal that I had for a future business? When do I give up, when do I know that’s the right thing and when do I keep pushing forward and know that it’s just a phase I’m in, it’s just a feeling I’m having in that moment? This episode and this topic was inspired by a question I got on my Instagram stories a few weeks ago. I posted kind of like an ask me anything type question box on my stories and I got a question along the lines of this which was do you ever feel like giving up? I’m trying to balance the life demands while building my business and it’s all a lot and I’m having some doubts. I loved this question. I loved the realness and the rawness and the truthfulness of this question because it just shows the roller coaster ride that is having a business, building a business, starting a business, growing a business, expanding your business, no matter what, having anything to do with a business that is yours. There is a roller coaster ride of emotions and fears and doubts and worries and this thought of should I just give it up can come to mind for, I think, a lot of people. So really good question and a place. I think a lot of people find themselves and specifically find themselves when things get tough, when things get frustrating or overwhelming or slow or disappointing, when the roller coaster of business building is going uphill which happens, and sometimes it can happen a lot so the idea of quitting, of giving up, becomes real. So how do you know if you should listen to that idea and just let your business idea go, knowing it was great at the time but it’s not going to happen anymore? Or do you stick it out, knowing it’s a natural response to doing something outside your comfort zone? Because this is something that may come as a surprise that I say for some of you. There are times when you should give up, probably more than I think people realize. And I think some people don’t take those moments or those nudges to give up seriously in the moment and spend time and energy well beyond when they should, because they don’t think they can give up or they should give up or it’s right to give up. But there really are times when that is the right thing, when what you’ve been doing is no longer the right thing for you, when you’re no longer on the right path, when your spirit wants something else, when it truly isn’t the right direction for you anymore. But then there are also a lot of times when the idea of giving up comes straight from your ego, from that surface level mental chatter that, quite honestly, is just scared. It’s scared of the unknown, it’s scared of failure, scared of judgment, scared of being seen, of putting you out there, and so really, the conversation today is figuring out which one that is, which one is this feeling of wanting to give up coming from. So, going back to this original question from Instagram stories. Firstly, the first question have I ever felt like giving up? And I can tell you that I have had so many ups and downs over the past 11 years in business now, so many tears, so much worry, so many hard moments, so much frustration, so many, I will say, times when it was like what do I do? What do I do now, kind of thing. And those times are really what I kind of consider, questioning everything Like why did I do this? Why is it so hard? What do I do? How do I get out of this? How do I make this work? You know questioning all the questions, but I really truly can tell you with certainty that I never felt like giving up on my business altogether. That has really never, ever been an option for me, I think for a few reasons. First of all, I want it too badly and I do think that part of that comes from having it. So now that I have the business that I want, I am happy with how it’s going. I have been for a while. It is very fulfilling for me. It allows the time flexibility, the financial flexibility, the freedom that I want in my life and that is important to me and was a big reason for building a business in the first place. So I have experienced it and I think, once you experience it, that desire to always have it is very, very strong. Knowing how it feels and how it is and what it provides for you is a really helpful place to know that you want to stay. So the idea of giving up and not having this anymore does not ever cross my mind. Now I think it can be harder, if you know what you want but you haven’t gotten there yet to have that same sense of wanting it so badly and wanting it to stick around so badly. But that doesn’t make it impossible because you know what you want, you know how you want it to look, you know how you want it to feel, you know what those values are that you are looking to build into your business and life. So it is still there and it is still possible to refer back to that when you do have those moments of wanting to quit or wanting to give up. So I think that’s a big part of why I don’t really ever think about giving up and really haven’t ever, because I want it too badly and I know it’s what I meant to be doing. So I have this level of fulfillment. I am very attuned to my bigger why and that has always been at the forefront. I’ve never lost sight of it from day one. And all these moments that have been really hard and I still have hard moments probably once a week, it happens all the time or just these moments of fear or doubt or uncertainty, that is part of this roller coaster ride. It would maybe smooths out a little bit, but you still have those bumps. It’s like a kiddie roller coaster ride and not like the Magnum right. So I’m still in that place where I have ups and downs and have always had that. But my bigger Y is very, very clear for me and I live it. And another thing is that I don’t have a plan B and I have not really ever had a plan B. I’ve had times where I’ve thought, okay, if this doesn’t work, I can do this in my business or I can make this pivot or whatever, just almost as like ego safety mechanism. But I’ve never had I can go get this job or I can go do this, as I’ve mentioned in past episodes, from day one of having my business it’s been my only source of income and I think in some ways that was really scary and really stressful and quite a risk. But it also helped me be really focused on what I wanted and where I wanted to go and what I needed to pay my bills. So that focus has always been there and I’ve never had that backup plan, that plan B. I think at this point I’m pretty much unemployable because I have been out of having a typical job for 11 years. I have no idea what I would even put on my resume or what people would even look for, so I think that’s out of the question at this point. So giving up in that sense is kind of out of the question and really hasn’t even crossed my mind in many, many years Now. That all being said, I have given up on paths that my business was going down, even when on the surface level it seemed like a terrible idea. Like things are going so well. Why would you ever quit? Why would you ever give up on this? I’ve done that. The biggest one that I talk about here quite a bit on the show is pivoting away from my nutrition business at the height of its success. So I was on track for a seven figure year. I had just had my first ever six figure month and I felt this visitation was a visceral, full body, energetic need to quit, to pivot and move on. It wasn’t out of fear, it wasn’t coming from my ego. It was a full body knowing that it was not the path for me any longer, and that, in my opinion, is when you know that giving up is the right thing to do, when giving up makes sense. So what’s the difference here? How can you know which of these places that you’re in, when you should give up and when you should keep going? Here are some things to consider. When you feel like giving up, what does it feel like? Where is it coming from? And a really important one, what was the thought you had right before that thought of giving up? Was it like? This is so hard. I don’t have time for this. I don’t have energy for this. How am I gonna get this done? What if no one wants what I have to offer? What if this doesn’t work? What if I’m a total failure? This is all just taking too long. I can’t believe how much goes into this, you know. Is it like this rant coming from your ego, with all these fears and stories and overwhelm and worries and all that stuff? Or is it from this place of? This doesn’t feel right. This isn’t lighting me up anymore. My desires have changed. This end result that I have been wanting is no longer the right thing for me. The differences between those is pretty obvious, right? One coming from that ego, one coming from that fear-based place and one just being this like very calm, centered, knowing. And that’s when you know it’s coming from your inner voice. And that’s really what we’re looking for here. Was it a nudge from the inner voice or a protection mechanism from the ego? That is the ultimate question a calm, knowing, centered, nudge or a scared, worried, overwhelmed ego? That is how you can make decisions really in every aspect of your life, including the next step that you should take in your business. And ultimately, it’s about giving up because you want to, because it’s no longer your path, not because your ego is loud and fear is creeping in, because that’s gonna happen. No matter what you choose, you’re always going to have that loud ego. So if you are to give up when it’s not the right thing, then you just have your ego talking about that process, so it’s never gonna go anywhere. So you have to know which voice you’re listening to. Now, next thing for you to do check in with your bigger why, and really this is something that you should do anytime you’re feeling like your ego is coming in hot, like it’s really strong and really loud, always come back to your bigger why. Why do you really want this business? On the deepest of deepest levels, what is really important here? And why did this idea for you having a business come up in the first place? Because, trust me, there are millions and millions and millions of people in this world where having their own business would never, ever, in a million years, cross their mind. So there is a reason you are here, there’s a reason you’re listening to this show, there’s a reason you’re working on this business. And why is that? Not on the surface level, but this deeper why, and thinking about that and why you started this in the first place. Are you still there? Does that still align? Does that still make sense and matter to you? It might not, and that is okay. That’s a great thing for you to know. It is completely okay for your bigger why’s to change and evolve over the course of your life. So it’s just a matter of tapping in and making sure you are still in alignment and it hasn’t shifted. And one last really big question to ask yourself this is so huge If you knew your business would be a massive success and bring you everything you want, would you still want to quit? So, going back to my example of my big pivot it was successful, it was growing, it was thriving, it was bringing in a lot of income and a lot of freedom and flexibility. And it was still a no for me. It was still a deep knowing that that was not my right path any longer. So If you were in that same boat and you knew that your business was going to be a massive success, just as you are creating it right now, would you still want to quit? Would you still want to give up? That is how you know if it’s coming from the ego or it’s coming from your inner voice. Now I want to quickly bring up the last part to this question, because I think this is a big talking point too, which is the struggle to manage life demands and business building, and this is so, so common and my guess is that a big piece to the person who wrote this to them. Wanting this business is so that she has more time for her family, more time for her life stuff, more time for herself. That’s just my guess, and maybe the same thing goes for you, like part of the reason why you are building this business is so that you have more time for your family and your friends and your social life and other life demands and other relationships and time for yourself. All of that is usually a pretty common reason why people start building their own businesses. So part of your bigger why is also what’s causing you to question it all, which, again, is really common, I think. So you want the business so you can quit your job and work for yourself, but your job is keeping you from working on your business. You want the business so that you can have more time with your family, and yet having time with your family is keeping you from building your business. You know it’s one of these things that I think happens a lot, and so I just want to mention here that, obviously, time with your family is a priority. Your job that is bringing in income is a priority. Friendships, a social life, time for your own self care. All of that is a priority, or should be a priority, in your life, right, but your business can also have a place in there too. It can also be a priority, and I know a lot of you are already working on it when you can and trying to make it a priority, and there’s just a lot going on. So I think, first of all, give yourself some grace and manage your expectations for yourself and how much you can put into a day. You’re not going to be able to work on your business full time while also having a full time job or having a family that you’re caring for, or trying to be everyone to everything and still have a social life and still have time. Still have time for yourself and everything that you’re doing in your life right now. And it’s so easy when we’re in that place to feel like it’s not happening fast enough, because, again, you have this deep desire for what you want your business to bring you and it’s exciting to think about, and so you wish it were happening quicker. And maybe then you get a little frustrated with yourself, maybe that it’s not happening as fast as you want, that you’re moving slower than you expected. So just have some grace here and don’t let that be the reason that you quit. It’s okay if it takes some time. Set your expectations in a way that makes sense for everything else in your life and do what you can to work on your business when you can. Now, that being said, there is the ability and I almost want to say responsibility in a way of creating boundaries for both your life and your business. I think that helps a lot, which all starts with having a plan for this. So you have times and days where it’s just you and your family, or it’s you at work and not thinking about your business, and then you have times where it’s just you and your business and you have boundaries with that. Those times are your business times. It’s okay to have boundaries with your family. When it is that time, maybe your partner is with the kids, or you have a nanny come over or their kids go to gymnastics, and that is strictly business time and it’s on the schedule, it’s on the calendar. The whole family knows. They know why this is time spent away from them, because it is actually for them too. The benefit is for the entire family for having this business. So reminding them of that getting your partner on board, getting family members on board and making it just really like having this communication around it and having these boundaries set for your business, that is okay. It doesn’t have to be an afterthought or something that you just stick in when you can. You can have a schedule and a plan around it, with lots of communication across the board, so that it is very intentional time where it is a priority in your life, while everything else can also be a priority in your life and it’s just another thing like that gets put on the calendar, that gets talked about, that gets managed and planned. And I know that doesn’t really sound all that fun to have yet another thing to plan and manage. But again, that’s probably part of the reason why you want a business in the first place is to have more time, have more free time and more flexibility and less things on the calendar, and so maybe this is kind of the time before that where you do have one more thing on the calendar that is getting you there, so that you can think about it that way. Okay, so I just wanted to talk about that side of the question too that was popped in there, because I think that’s a really important thing to discuss and I think is something a lot of you are trying to manage in your life and with your business. So it’s important to talk about those boundaries that you can set both time away from your business and time with your business. Okay, I guess we will leave it at that. I hope I gave you some food for thought on when to really lean into that idea of maybe this business isn’t for me anymore. Maybe I do want to give up, maybe I do want to pivot, maybe I just need a break. It could be so many different things and it all comes back to is it your ego or is it your inner voice? And it doesn’t take a lot of training and either one of those to know where it’s coming from, when you really just sit and listen and think about those thoughts and those emotions that you’re having and where that idea of giving up is coming from in the first place. And also know that if you do have these moments where you feel like quitting, where you feel like giving up, where you feel like going to your plan B, that is normal, that is to be expected. That is part of the roller coaster ride, but now hopefully you have some tips and tools to use the next time that happens, to know if it really is a valid idea or if you just need to step back for a little bit and have a little fun. Okay, well, this will do it for this episode. If you have a question that you would like answered on the show, send me a DM over on Instagram at Shawn Mynar. That is where I collect possible listener questions. I think it’s really fun to do listener questions here. Trust me, if you have a question about your business, chances are Almost everyone does too, so it’s really fun to get them answered here for everyone. So head over there at Shawn Mynar on Instagram and send me a DM there. I would love to hear from you and until next time, take care, hey, wait up before you go. Do you want to know the biggest reason why your business may not flow? Because it’s not in alignment with your personality type. Building the right business for you means knowing your strengths, weaknesses, energetic expression and what’s most important to you, so you can build your business accordingly. Before you spend one more minute working on your business, let’s make sure it’s the right business for you. I’ve created a fun two minute quiz to discover your flow business personality type. With the results of this quiz, you’ll know exactly what to prioritize in your business so you can feel confident, knowing you’re building a business you love. Head over to shawnmynar.com/quiz right now to find out your flow business personality type and once you find that out, hop over to Instagram and let me know what you discover. Again, that’s shawnmynar.com/quiz. As always, the link is in the show notes.

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Hey there, I'm Shawn!

I’m obsessed with nitro cold brew, 90% dark chocolate, and helping coaches and practitioners build a business they love. With nothing but a passion for helping others and the desire to never have a boss again, I quit the corporate world and built my own million dollar coaching business over the past decade. Now, I help others do the same.

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